Writing this post isn't easy— but I want to be open, transparent and honest when it comes to what actually goes through a woman's mind while being pregnant, especially when it's their first pregnancy.
Before I get into the details, I want to note that this post is describing my personal feelings during pregnancy— feelings that I'm sure other women can relate to, and feelings that are OKAY to feel. Because this is my first pregnancy, all these feelings are very new.
Here's A Peek Into My Pregnancy
The journey to get pregnant was full of emotions— medications that made me feel and look pregnant, but I wasn't month after month. It was hard and mentally took a toll on me, but thankful to be here at 38.5 weeks pregnant.
This pregnancy has been rough, nothing at all like I thought it'd be. What I saw on social media was nothing like what I have experienced: the constant feeling of exhaustion, being sick, feeling nauseous most of the time, not being able to workout, constant aches, and the list goes on.
And if that wasn't enough, the gaining weight aspect hit me a lot harder than I thought it would. Gaining weight in any type of situation can be hard, even when there's a good reason for it. It's been even more difficult for me because of my past* but also because it's out of my control is a tough pill to swallow for me.
While I'm no longer in a place where my weight dictates and controls my life, gaining weight during pregnancy has brought up some of those old feelings. The days I feel the negative thoughts creeping in, I try to do everything I can to block them out. I know the weight gain is what the baby needs, but I feel as if I'm losing control of my own body.
This pregnancy has challenged me to continue on the self-acceptance and self-love journey— which I'm thankful for. It has taught me that there is no way to avoid these feelings, but rather to embrace them.
Things That Have Helped:
- Remind myself that it's a marathon, not a sprint— focus on the big picture (I'm going to have a baby!)
- Turn to your spouse— be open and honest with them
- Talk to other women about body changes and feelings— it helps you feel less alone
- Remind myself that the weight gain is what is needed for the baby
- Dive into things that make you feel good— for me it's baking/cooking
- Read positive quotes on social media (Instagram and Pinterest)
- Follow social media accounts that make you feel good
- Take time for yourself— whether it's going for a walk, taking a nap, strolling the aisles of Target or getting your nails done
While the transition into pregnancy (and being pregnant) hasn't been the easiest, it's been a learning experience.
If you feel the same, know that you're not alone and your feelings are normal. Your body is changing, more than it ever has before.
Photos: Naomi Hopkins Photography